Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Baby New Year

Happy 2013! I hope you had a fun New Years Eve celebrating with loved ones as the ball dropped. I bet it was a memorable night, probably much different than my NYE, which I'll definitely get to, but first...

Whoever thought Baby New Year made sense as a mascot for the holiday must not have had a baby. Babies are terrible for New Years celebrations. Let me tell you why:

  • They have early bedtimes, well before midnight

  • They wake up a lot, usually at inopportune times, like when the ball drops

  • They don't really like to wear hats, and they rarely attend functions formal enough for a top hat
  • Fireworks and poppers scare babies

Why am I so cranky about Baby New Year? It's because of how I rang in 2013. Oh, what did I do as I rung in the New Year, you ask? I peed, but that's not all. I peed while The First Mate screamed his head off in opposition.

I was determined to stay awake until midnight and even chose to forgo a much needed deserved glass of wine. I didn't want to fall asleep. I put The First Mate to bed, which he was stubborn about, so dinner wasn't until quarter to nine. No big deal, it was NYE, we would be up late anyways.

After a delicious dinner and dessert The Captain and I headed upstairs to indulge in our new nightly ritual, catching up on episodes of Dexter. We had just enough time for 2 whole episodes before the ball would drop. About halfway through the second episode, at 11:23pm I heard a familiar sound. It was The First Mate stirring on the monitor. I waited to see if he would settle, but no luck. I headed in to get him back to sleep. This is usually a 20-30 minutes process, so I might still make it out by midnight.

He fell back asleep fairly easily and I waited to make sure he was out enough to put back in the crib. He screamed and stood up as soon as he hit the mattress. Back to square one. This time he fought me and kicked me, but he went back asleep. I still had 3 minutes until midnight, but I had to pee!

I decided I just couldn't hold it anymore and made an attempt to put the baby back in the crib. This attempt also failed. Now I was standing up and my bladder was ready to let loose. I tried to soothe The First Mate and told him I would be back in a minute and bolted towards the bathroom. I heard the countdown as I ran past. 5, 4... then all I heard was the echo of my emptying bladder and the guttural screams of my toddler convinced he would die alone in his crib.

That was my moment of ringing in a new year. It was not at all what I pictured. I had envisioned a comfy cuddled up kiss with The Captain while watching a replay of the Times Square Ball drop and then promptly going to sleep. Lets only hope it gets better than the first minute.

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